Mrs M
yoda76TEENAGER MAKES UP KIDNAP STORY – AT WHAT COST?
March 21st 2007 01:24
Yesterday I read this article titled Teen's kidnap story 'hid tryst with girl' on the smh.com.au website.
Simply, 19 year old Mohammed Intiaz Rafeeq decided to take a day off work to spend time with his girlfriend. Fearing that his parents may find out his deceit he rang Triple 0 with an elaborate story that he had been kidnapped.
The police responded quickly racing to his aid. One of the police cars actually crashed into a telegraph pole injuring the police officer inside. Rafeeq was ‘rescued’ and taken to the police station to make a statement and then onto hospital, where he was given priority over sick patients, to be treated for ‘injuries’ he sustained during the kidnapping.
It wasn’t long before his story began to unravel and the truth came out. He feared his parents.
Now, like most people, I am angry that Rafeeq stupidly used emergency services to help himself out of a tight spot. But on the other hand, how bad is his home life if he feels the need to go to such lengths to cover up the fact that he took a sickie to spend time with his girlfriend. Hardly a hangable offence.
My father and I fought constantly while I was growing up. He was very strict and extremely unreasonable. I often lied and took days of school to go do the sorts of things that my friends were allowed to do on the weekend – you know, go shopping for a few hours, go see a movie, hang out at a friend’s house. My father never allowed me to do any of these things.
I would have done anything, suffered the wrath of anybody else, than suffer the wrath of my father if I had been caught doing the ‘wrong thing’. And why was I doing the wrong thing? Because I was pushed so far into a corner that there was no where else to go. But of course being caught doing the ‘wrong thing’ is exactly the reason my father would have given me for standing his ground and not allowing me to go out.
What had I done to deserve such treatment? Nothing as far as I can tell. This was all about him. He didn’t trust for reasons unknown to me but I think more accurately he just didn’t want to have to worry about raising a teenager. If I was home, then he didn’t have to worry. He said he was keeping me out of trouble. I said he was keeping me from growing up.
Rafeeq is 19 – not a child but not yet a man. And if his parents watch his every move how is he ever going to grow up? To me, that equates to parental neglect – failing to teach him, failing to raise him.
Rafeeq’s father had to pay $3000 in bond and Rafeeq needs to report to the police everyday as part of his bail conditions. The police are also seeking $50,000 from Rafeeq to pay for the damage to the police car and cover wages for wasted police time.
I feel for Rafeeq. I’m sure his parent’s reaction to all this is far worse than if they found out he had just taken a sickie.
What do you think?
Simply, 19 year old Mohammed Intiaz Rafeeq decided to take a day off work to spend time with his girlfriend. Fearing that his parents may find out his deceit he rang Triple 0 with an elaborate story that he had been kidnapped.
The police responded quickly racing to his aid. One of the police cars actually crashed into a telegraph pole injuring the police officer inside. Rafeeq was ‘rescued’ and taken to the police station to make a statement and then onto hospital, where he was given priority over sick patients, to be treated for ‘injuries’ he sustained during the kidnapping.
It wasn’t long before his story began to unravel and the truth came out. He feared his parents.
Now, like most people, I am angry that Rafeeq stupidly used emergency services to help himself out of a tight spot. But on the other hand, how bad is his home life if he feels the need to go to such lengths to cover up the fact that he took a sickie to spend time with his girlfriend. Hardly a hangable offence.
My father and I fought constantly while I was growing up. He was very strict and extremely unreasonable. I often lied and took days of school to go do the sorts of things that my friends were allowed to do on the weekend – you know, go shopping for a few hours, go see a movie, hang out at a friend’s house. My father never allowed me to do any of these things.
I would have done anything, suffered the wrath of anybody else, than suffer the wrath of my father if I had been caught doing the ‘wrong thing’. And why was I doing the wrong thing? Because I was pushed so far into a corner that there was no where else to go. But of course being caught doing the ‘wrong thing’ is exactly the reason my father would have given me for standing his ground and not allowing me to go out.
What had I done to deserve such treatment? Nothing as far as I can tell. This was all about him. He didn’t trust for reasons unknown to me but I think more accurately he just didn’t want to have to worry about raising a teenager. If I was home, then he didn’t have to worry. He said he was keeping me out of trouble. I said he was keeping me from growing up.
Rafeeq is 19 – not a child but not yet a man. And if his parents watch his every move how is he ever going to grow up? To me, that equates to parental neglect – failing to teach him, failing to raise him.
Rafeeq’s father had to pay $3000 in bond and Rafeeq needs to report to the police everyday as part of his bail conditions. The police are also seeking $50,000 from Rafeeq to pay for the damage to the police car and cover wages for wasted police time.
I feel for Rafeeq. I’m sure his parent’s reaction to all this is far worse than if they found out he had just taken a sickie.
What do you think?
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Comment by David
I didn't have strict parents ... (that explains a fair bit, doesn't it? ...
But I do know what it's like to live in fear of your own father ... I actually feel genuinely sorry for Rafeeq... that he felt he had to go to such lengths in order to avoid his father's wrath ...
Fear of one's own parents makes children do some crazy things at times ... and it can often warp their perception of anyone in a position of authority ... (and can often do a lot of other damage ... I only hope for him, it isn't long-term damage ... He's probably too scared to even leave home ... (I'm one of the lucky ones ... my dad left home before I had to ...
Chaste cheek embraces and none of that other stuff ...
David ...
Comment by D. Armenta
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Comment by yoda76
The Tube Blog
I had a strict Dad, too, but I chose to live with it for the most part and save my energy until I really found something worth fighting for - and now I'm married to her ;o)
Comment by Kleonaptra
Kalikapsychosis
My mum wanted to keep me at home and give me freedom at the same time. That equals now a rocky relationship and me never knowing what boundaries I have. I lied and snuck out but was also given days off to do things.
I should mention I did run away once - on a property with a horse - and when I let the horse go but disappeared all hell broke loose. The other kids thought it might be a blast to tell everyone I was drunk and suicidal, causing the police to visit my friends read my diary, and start up a full scale search. When I came back I was quite miffed at all the action, I was even in the newspaper! I still havnt forgiven all those kids who made up fancy stories causing the cops to be called at all. Of course I was blamed harshly for the whole thing. Sigh.
Comment by Mrs M
Mum's Word
I think you're absolutely right. It's amazing this hold parents can have on their kids.
I'm sorry to hear that for your life to be better your dad have to leave. That's not how it's supposed to be.
Hi D Armenta,
And that's the real crime here. He may very well think he has had not part in this and that he just has a disobedient son if he just did what he was told, he wouldn't get into any trouble.
Hi yoda76,
As long as she was worth it.
Hi Kleonaptra,
Please write a book. You have so many stories about your life. I love reading them.
Thanks for the visit and the comments everyone.
Love & stuff
Mrs M
Comment by yoda76
The Tube Blog
You know it.
;o)
Comment by Ash
Flashes of memories
Wow! that`s really sad... I know that I used to sneak around myself because I wasn`t allowed to go places and do things(not all the time, more as I grew older and it wasn`t as simple as staying over at a friends house with mum and dad in the next room)...it brought a weird sense of triumph...like I was victorious and in the end I used to do things that I didn`t even want to ....just to prove a point. The thrill of being someone that I wasn`t supposed to be outweighed the consequences...until actually getting caught that is. I am just thankful that I did not have to pay the consequences that this young man had to...
It`s a pity that people cannot see the reasons behind others actions, they just look at what has been done...oh he is like that because he is just a naughty child, oh she is promiscuous because she is just a tart, he is an alcoholic because he is a lazy so-and-so...
Thanks for sharing the story.
ash
Comment by Kleonaptra
Kalikapsychosis
Comment by Mrs M
Mum's Word
We all do stupid things to get a thrill (I need to remember that when my kids grow up) but there is a difference between doing things for a thrill and doing something as a survival mechanism - which is what I assume this guy was doing. And you're right - it's sad.
Absolutely.
Hi Kleonaptra,
All the more reason to write a book
Love & stuff
Mrs M